Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Starting Right Now


Today is the first day of the rest of your life …

That’s kind of a sappy cliché, but it seems appropriate at this time of my life. I find that I’m beginning several new things and I’m open to possibilities. It feels a bit like when I was in college. I was aware that I could do anything I wanted to with my life. I could be whatever my imagination allowed me to invent. I just had to choose. Except at that time, I didn’t choose, and I was inexperienced and naïve. I still prefer to let things happen rather than forcing fate. I also remain rather naïve, and I seem to repeat some of the same mistakes over and over again. However, I’m more forgiving and accepting of myself nowadays. Maybe that’s the key to this whole maturity business. Learn and grow with more courage and grace.

To begin with, I find myself sort of single today. In an effort to protect the innocent, I’m not going to explain what "sort of single" means right now. All you need to know is that I don’t cheat or lie in relationships and I take my commitments seriously. With that said, I’m back on the market. There are open spots on my dance card. I’m ready for Prince Charming. So if you know anyone who would look good on me, feel free to pass on my resume. You can find it here.

My new job is going well. There’s a lot to learn. It seems like more pressure than my old job. I like that. However, I don’t expect this particular job to fill my soul with a sense of purpose. I’ve had that job and it took over my life. This job is easy to leave behind. No one calls me at home, and I never feel inclined to go in early or stay late because someone’s life will be impaired if I don’t. It’s enough that I’m contributing, I work with pleasant people, and I’m not bored out of my mind. I'm not changing the world with my 9 to 5 efforts, but who knows where this job could lead? Life has a way of changing directions when you least expect it.

It’s time for a new and improved body. When I got all my winter clothes out a couple weeks ago, my waistbands were snug. It’s time to watch the calories and hit the gym extra hard. I don’t want to become a slave to the scale, but I’m also not willing to buy a whole new wardrobe. Besides, there are cute guys at the gym. The more time I spend there, the more I can gawk . . . Oh, and it’s healthy for me too.

My baby sister had her first baby yesterday!!!!!!!!!! HOORAY, I’m a new aunt again. She had a beautiful boy. We’re calling him Ducky, but his birth certificate says something else.

My housemate is finally moving on and moving out. I will have new space and new privacy. It will feel like a whole new house! It will be mine and I’ll have room to breathe and create even more new things. The first new creation is a new rule: No one else is moving into this house unless I’m moving out.

Learning, changing and growing seem to provide the substance of life. I Love the freedom of reinventing myself whenever I choose. A close friend and Lover once gave me a pewter polliwog (tadpole) as a symbol of his acceptance. He’d been having difficulty accepting how much I seek new experiences, people and challenges. Eventually, despite his sincere gesture, it was too much for him. I still treasure his gift, and occasionally I ponder its meaning. I wonder if I'll always remain a polliwog. If not, I hope I find a really rockin' lily pad and a hunky Prince Charming.

16 Comments:

At 8:59 AM, Blogger Laurie said...

I love your attitude!

Making mistakes is ok as long as we learn from them - and like you said, it's part of the growing process called "life".

Congrats on your new nephew :-)

 
At 9:29 AM, Blogger JayneSays said...

Congratulations on your new job, room to breathe (this is huge!) nephew, and prospects, just around the corner. Love your resume; will keep my match-making cap on. . .

 
At 10:05 AM, Blogger AndyT13 said...

All good stuff T. Nice resume!
Good onya new jobby and yer new space (and the new rule pertaining thereto. Here's a WOOOHOOO! for ya!

 
At 10:08 AM, Blogger littlefeet said...

sort of single...yeah...been there before...it was a good thing... :)

LOVE your resume...too cool...

awesome on the job...sometimes ya just need something that fills the time... :)

good luck at the gym...and good looking as well...thats important too... :)

awesome about Ducky!!!!! :)

and on the room to breathe...it is so essential to life... :)

peace...

 
At 10:37 AM, Blogger twocents said...

You've never really struck me as a lily pad kinda girl. Enjoy the space to breathe and congrats on that new little Ducky!!!

 
At 12:55 PM, Blogger Al said...

well baby girl - here's a hug, in true gloria gaynor style - you will survive (Yes, I did that on purpose to put a song in your head - sorry) Glad the new job is going well and that you will have your own space. remember that if it get's a little cold in the land of river city this winter - it's toasty down here

 
At 2:24 PM, Blogger Bougie Black Boy said...

Good luck on living alone! Its great and I would have it no other way.

 
At 3:35 PM, Blogger Ron Southern said...

More than 30 years ago, Playboy had a cartoon that depicted a similar frog in which the princess was saying over the phone, "Well, Mother, we'd go the party, but you know how moody Ronnie is." That's me, I'm afraid. So's your picture. Outside, I'm thinner, inside I'm the same green.

 
At 3:45 PM, Blogger Ron Southern said...

That's a cute girl, your friend Laurie. I just noticed. Nize.

 
At 5:21 PM, Blogger Blazngfyre said...

HOOOOORAY!!!!!
On the job ....
The darling new Ducky ....
and most important,

BREATHING SPACE
*sigh*



(I AM totally jealous BTW!)

 
At 5:27 PM, Blogger Popeye said...

Better is better. Ain't that deep. . .

 
At 6:20 PM, Blogger R. U. Serious said...

Why do I get the feeling I am not a candidate?

 
At 11:38 AM, Blogger Julie said...

I hit the gym this week too. After the marathon I had a hard time working out regulary.

Your energy and passion are tireless...you will create the life you love!

 
At 1:50 PM, Blogger Anonymous Assclown said...

You're well-served by not defining yourself by your job - it's what you do, not who you are. There are plenty of non-occupational outlets for saving the world that you can take advantage of.

I'd be curious as to how you were handling the birth of your sister's baby. Sometimes events like that can trigger emotional issues.

 
At 8:51 PM, Blogger theresa said...

AC - I sometimes regret never having a child. Events like this remind me of that regret. You can be sure there's more to it than that, but for now, that's all I'm willing to share.

 
At 9:40 PM, Blogger Anonymous Assclown said...

Thanks for sharing even that much

 

Post a Comment

<< Home