Saturday, May 07, 2005

Love in a Purple Hat

My friend died today. Her name was Joleen.

We weren't particularly close friends, but we worked together. And, until the time Joleen got sick and left work, we chatted nearly every day. I looked forward to seeing her because she was always happy to see me. Often, I made it a point to say something to make her laugh. She was smart and funny and beautiful. Anyone would have wanted to make her laugh.

Joleen’s favorite color was purple. She wore it every single day.

I liked to say, "Joleen, that’s a beautiful blouse you’re wearing. I especially love the color."

She’d respond, "Why thank you, Theresa. You know, purple’s my favorite color." And we’d both giggle a little at our silly ritual.

That was before she got sick.

I didn’t know what to do when Joleen got sick. I called her, but the person who answered the phone said that she was too tired to talk. A few days later another friend at work said that Joleen was starting chemotherapy and wondered if I would make her a hat to wear when her hair fell out. It was October. With the cool fall weather, she would need a hat.

I spent several days looking for exactly the right pattern and exactly the right yarn to make a hat for Joleen. I could do that.
I could knit Joleen a beautiful purple hat.

When it was finished, the hat was lovely. But the thing you couldn’t see by looking at it, was the love and wishes and hope that I had stitched in between the yarn. I had concentrated really hard to put as much as I could into her hat.

Sometimes people die no matter how much we love and wish and hope for them.

The last time I talked to Joleen was when she called me to thank me a second time for making her a beautiful purple hat.


The world lost one fabulous purple-lovin' Hot Chik today.

12 Comments:

At 3:39 AM, Blogger amantedelmundo said...

As I cruise through this Blogg universe I find a lot of nonsense. Although I'm sure I a contributor; however, I was glad to find a sencere and tuching story.

Good for you, for letting someone know that something of themselves was memorable. Even if it came in the form of a color

 
At 7:19 AM, Blogger Queen Of Pink said...

I'm very sorry for the loss of your friend Theresa. What a fun ritual you had, something shared and treasured.

You will be in my thoughts...

 
At 9:44 PM, Blogger Ron Southern said...

You made me miss Joleen, too. And made me think of my long-deceased old friend, David. See tomorrow's TRS post, if you have the stamina.

 
At 2:21 PM, Blogger SG said...

You have brought tears to my eyes with this touching story. My condolences. Sending big hugs and positive thoughts.

 
At 8:30 PM, Anonymous dick said...

Sorry about your loss.

 
At 9:05 PM, Blogger theresa said...

Thank you everyone. It's nice to have a place to express myself and be received with such compassion and love.

 
At 11:59 PM, Blogger Rhodent said...

A wonderful tribute to Joleen and your friendship.

 
At 12:05 AM, Anonymous Sasha said...

I'm sorry for your loss. The love that doesn't show in the hat, shows in your post.

 
At 9:46 AM, Blogger Chick said...

I’m sorry you lost your purple lovin’ friend...

...it’s the small things...like someone making a hat for you...that you never forget...

 
At 10:53 AM, Blogger Rednaked said...

Sweetie, I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend. I'd bet you were as much a blessing in her life as she was in yours.

 
At 11:27 AM, Blogger Opaco said...

i am very very sorry for your loss.

 
At 8:55 AM, Blogger Tiger said...

...again. Your soul is just so dang lovely...
Y'know. I'm studying reiki--it's my Thing of The Moment... and really kind of super cool actually, but anyway. My gf knows that purple is my favorite color & she's certified Reiki II so she infused it with energy/reiki whatever you want to call it. I love wearing it. ...but my point is--what I've learned more than anything through my study of Energy Medicine (not just reiki, but there are ALL sorts of energy work similar, tradition etc--the thing is what they say the most is--it's the INTENTION behind it more than the knowing.

...I am certain your friend felt every ounce of love & hope & healing that you put into that hat.

I'm certain of it.

& the world is always a little "less" when it loses a purple lovin' hot chik. ((hugs))

 

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