Friday, April 15, 2005


These are my answers to the o-so-creative Blog-A-Thon questions that Cricket asked me. If you’re interested in reading her equally clever questions for the other participants, click on her name to visit her blog.

… so … what was the nature of the prank involving the green wig and lots and lots of fake crying?

Cricket was very kind not to ask me the other question from that post (she’s a gem!)

During my visit to Durham, J and I had a "girl’s day" while M was Mr. Responsible and went to work. We "girls" went to the spa and had facials, did lunch at a trendy little café and shopped & gossiped until our little tootsies were worn out. However, throughout the day, we played out a plan to surprise M with a little prank.

J called him at his office and told him that he was concerned about how I had let myself go and I was in desperate need of some help, particularly with my hair (of course, he pretended I was in the shower during the conversation). He told M that my hair was all nasty; the color was dull, it was out of shape and frizzy on the ends. As my friends they had a responsibility to intervene. M told J that he thought I looked fine and J should leave well enough alone, but J was insistent.

Throughout the day, J made several related phone calls to M telling him of his progress. He included a phone call telling him that he convinced Janet, the gal who cuts their hair, to get me in for an emergency appointment. The final phone call was J in hysterics telling M that Janet had messed everything up, my hair was a disaster, and I had locked myself in the bathroom. M was beside himself. He launched into a lecture reminding J that he shouldn’t have interfered.

When M came home I was in the bathroom fixing myself up with my favorite wig (the bright green pageboy). However, J told him that I’d been in there for over an hour crying my eyes out. M knocked on the door and gently suggested that it couldn’t be "all that bad". The sincerity in his voice mixed with my own evilness made me start laughing, so I had to turn it into a fake cry.

Finally, I told him I’d come out of the bathroom if he’d go into the next room and wait for me. When I came out and he saw me with that crazy wig on, he knew right away that we’d been pulling his leg all day. I think he was a bit miffed, but he was a really good sport about it. J has some great photos of M & I. I should see if he’ll send me one to post.

… if you could be the house cat or lap dog of any person on earth, whose would you choose to be? (why?)

Definitely Janine Garafelo! That woman treats her dogs like they are her precious little babies. She spoils them completely rotten. That’s the way I should be treated. Additionally, she’s funny, smart, gorgeous, and a total Hot Chik! Get outta my way and let me on her lap!

… if you could have had the staring role in one movie already made, which movie would you pick? (why?)

This is so hard. I love movies and a dozen come to mind.
Hmmm …

Glenn Close in Dangerous Liaisons? Great costumes and a chance to be nasty and evil.

Thelma and Louise? Either part would be great, but Gina Davis gets it on with Brad Pitt. Oh Yeah!
(Good grief, I’m like Pavlov’s dogs. I start salivating as soon as I type his name)

Mulan? I know it’s an animated movie, but it rocks! Mulan is a total Hot Chik!

When Harry Met Sally? Come on, who hasn’t wanted to do the orgasm scene in the diner? Mmmmm …. Oh yeah baby … like that … yeah … uh huh … oh … oh … god … oh god … OH GOD … OH, OH, OH, OH GOD! AHHHHhhhhhh . . . . .

In A Long Kiss Goodnight, Gina Davis gets to save Samuel L Jackson’s sorry ass over and over again. She’s practically a super-hero tough chik. That could be fun. I could also hurt ... moving on ...

The Wizard of Oz? It’s clearly one of the best films of all time, but where are the hotties?

Frances McDormand’s part in Fargo? Love this movie, and I can do the accent fairly well … I even know the difference between a Canadian accent and a Minnesotan accent. I’ve also got the collector snow globes. One has Francis kneeling down and barfing next to the over-turned car. The other has a leg sticking out of the wood-chipper. That one has red flecks mixed in with the snowflakes when you shake it.

A Fish Called Wanda? How many barrels of fun would I have being in the funniest damn movie with the funniest damn cast?

If I get to keep all the clothes, I have to say Renee Zellweger’s part in Down With Love. The movie is worth watching just for her outfits … and the fact that she’s cute as a bug in them. It co-Stars Ewan McGregor as her adorable love interest. He fits the role well and commands some genuinely funny moments. The movie is a playful romantic battle of the sexes story that makes fun of playful romantic battle of the sexes stories. Best of all, it drips from head to toe with rich and delicious campiness. And just when you think it can’t get any better, there are Wigs, dancing, and even more camp. But the kicker is that beneath all the clothes, wigs and silliness, it’s a redemption story. I can’t stay away from those things.

… would you enjoy an enormous fortune differently if you had inherited it rather than if you had earned it yourself? (why?)

Due to my professional experiences, I’ve had the good fortune of meeting people from many difference socio-economic classes. As for myself, I was raised by working class parents in a middle class neighborhood. My parents worked hard to make sure that we had everything we needed. They were also fortunate to have opportunities to earn a good living with their hard work and diligence.

I’ve met people who’ve worked hard and had life kick them in the teeth.

I’ve met people who are down and out and blame anyone and everyone for their sorry situation.

I’ve met folks who have it pretty easy because they worked hard previously to create an easy life for themselves.

I’ve met folks who have it pretty easy and think its because they deserve to have it easy.

My entire life would be different if I didn’t have the example of my father. He made John Deere tractors on 3rd shift in a factory foundry for 33 years. I never heard him complain about his job. He was glad for it because it paid well and he could provide for his family. Even though he could have moved to a 1st shift position after a few years, he preferred to stay on the overnight shift because it allowed him to be around when his children were around. He worked while we slept and he slept while we were at school. The rest of the time he was available to be our Dad.

I’d rather inherit a strong work ethic than bags of money, so I’m sure I’d rather earn my fortune.

… what’s your favorite kitchen utensil? why?

A spatula.

Spatula is one of my favorite words for no reason other than because it sounds cool when you say it. At the same time, it’s not a worthless piece of equipment. As a Master Baker (a little different than a masterbater), a good spatula is invaluable.

You should try my raspberry chocolate cheesecake. It’s almost too beautiful to eat!

Blog-A-Thon Instructions:

It will be my pleasure to interview the next however many people respond to this post who want to be interviewed.

Here’s how i
t works:

  1. Leave a comment saying "interview me" if you’d like to be interviewed.
  2. I’ll respond by asking you 5 questions here. They’ll be different than those above.
  3. Update your blog with your answers to the questions.
  4. When you do so, include this same explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same manner.
  5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you’ll ask them five new questions.


At 10:54 AM, Blogger Rednaked said...

What the hell - interview me.

At 11:06 AM, Blogger Rex Venom said...

Ummmmm! Two Hot Chicks! Two! Rock on!

At 11:17 AM, Blogger cricket said...

fabulous! but then, what else could we expect from such a hot chik? :)

At 11:23 AM, Blogger Tiger said...

...what great answers! :)
Interview me!! ;)

At 11:32 AM, Blogger SG said...

Even though I was recently interviewed, the questions weren't nearly as interesting as these. Great answers! Please interview me too. Oh and btw, still waiting for my prize form the lacy black undies story!

At 12:15 PM, Anonymous sk said...

WAVING HAND!! Interview me!! i love your answers!!

At 2:17 PM, Blogger Thomas said...

Bloody hell...

I'll bite: Interview me, the purveyor of prime porn.

At 4:24 AM, Blogger theresa said...

Thomas, I was writing questions when you took a bite. I'll add yours very soon. I'm glad you're here.

At 8:26 PM, Blogger kelebek }{ said...

Uh, Uh!! Me too me too. Someone interview the Turkish chick!!!
kelebek }{

At 1:08 AM, Blogger Kyle Stich said...

Interview me por favor.


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