Friday, May 06, 2005

Generosity

Friendship, kindness and affection offered as a gift is an act of loving generosity. Accompanied by a demand of reciprocity it loses its generous spirit and reeks of neediness and desperation. An honest gift loses neither its power nor its value in the face of rejection.

11 Comments:

At 3:58 AM, Blogger Ed said...

Wise words indeed, Theresa.

There's one particular "friend" of Sue's who could do with taking that on board.
(Not a blogger friend, I hasten to add.)

 
At 9:46 AM, Blogger Ron Southern said...

Looking back, I found "When Hugs and Kisses are Icky" and found it Perfect. Since you got plenty of admiration for it at the time, I will refrain from drooling over it and threatening to forcefully hug and kiss you. I'll just be a blase and fair-minded adult. Sigh.

 
At 10:13 AM, Blogger Chick said...

Well said...but I still hate rejection...

 
At 10:37 AM, Blogger Opaco said...

if there were no rejections, acceptance would lose its value.

 
At 10:52 AM, Blogger theresa said...

Ed - I've heard there's a relationship between wisdom and experience. If so, I'm showing both my age and my vulnerabiliity here.

Ron - (she non challantly nods at his blase response) Thanks. I was really pleased about the response to that post.

Chick - You hit on it exactly. I hate rejection so much that I had to find my way through it without compromising myself or becoming hateful and bitter.

I was recently reminded that sometimes non-rejections can still feel like rejections when you give it your all and don't get what you expected in return. Re-learning lessons sucks, rejection lessons in particular.

 
At 11:15 AM, Blogger cricket said...

the tricky part, unfortunately, is learning to give without expectations...human nature, of course, and easier said than done... :)

 
At 12:00 PM, Blogger Larry Jones said...

Theresa - What a beautiful statement, and sentiment! But how can we avoid the corruption of our world, where we are chumps if we don't come out ahead in every transaction?

 
At 5:22 PM, Blogger Queen Of Pink said...

Like Cricket said, learning to give without expectations is HARD.

Giving is easy, to most. Giving all is hard, for most. And yet most of us want it all to be given to us. It's a fine line to walk.

Crap, that all made sense in my head. And then I wrote it out. Maybe someone will understand it. Prolly not! lol

 
At 9:14 PM, Blogger Clark K. said...

If I understand the Queen of Pink correctly, I have to disagree with her slightly. Giving is not easy, even for the smallest things and even if you have the best of intentions. If it was easy, everybody'd be doin' it...

People like to take the easy road most of the time.

 
At 11:49 PM, Blogger theresa said...

Cricket - You're right, it is tricky. I try to be patient with my self by recognizing that learning is a process not an event.

Larry - What kind of world would it be if we proudly stood on top of a big heap of love and friendship instead of money and power?

Opaco - That's fine for other people, but I'm getting mighty tired of it :)

Pink - If I understand you correctly, I think you're talking about trust. If so, that's a whole new ballgame. Trust is supposed to be earned.

Man in the Middle - Maybe that's why I get really confused and feel like I don't fit in a lot of the time.

 
At 8:50 AM, Blogger Tiger said...

...gosh, this was kind of how I felt on Mother's Day. Last week had been a crazy/insane week (as though I've had one lately that hasn't been!! :) But I was just whipped and THOUGHT that as it was Mother's Day *I* should get to kick back and maybe not even be pampered and waited on, but at least be able to lounge in bed or on the couch and read & relax. The man was working on building our shed & wanted me to come sit outside and spend the day with him. I said that I was just exhausted and really just wanted to go do something quiet... He through a bit of a guilt trip on me...
"Oh, when we were first married you used to hang out with me ALL the time while I did projects. You NEVER do anymore."

...I felt like a big pile of Guilty Yuckiness... but responded with, "Y'know. That was before I had two kids and a house full of WORK that I can't keep up with--ever. I'm TIRED." Bah, he didn't care.

...Happy Mother's Day--take a trip! A GUILT trip, that is. Phhhblllttt...

He was half teasing... really. But only HALF. MEN!! ;)

 

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