Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Vote For My Mom!

My Mom is an absolute HOOT!

I talked to her on the phone the other day. Actually, she talked and I held the phone up to my ear. She’s really, really good at talking. In fact, when Monkey-Man decides to rescue me from a typical 75 minute phone call, we find it most effective if he runs into the room and yells, "HELP ME! THE CAT'S ON FIRE!"

In our recent conversation I got the low-down on her volunteer work, the church schedule, some new recipes, how all the grandchildren are doing and the weather. After about 45 minutes she says, "Oh, I almost forgot to tell you, the neighbors all nominated me, so I’m running for Mayor."

I started laughing, and I kept laughing and laughing and laughing ... I just couldn’t stop. The poor woman was getting upset because she didn’t know what I was laughing about, but there were so many things … and my tummy hurt and I really wanted to stop laughing after a while.

First: HOORAY ! ! ! I’m laughing because, GO MOM! Shit, YES! And, best of all because my brother told her it was a stupid thing for her to do. And double best of all, because his daughter (my Hot Chik in-training niece), and all the grandsons think it would be super cool if their Granny was the Mayor.

Second: The town is teeny-weeny. It’s just so cute that my little Mommy is going to be the Mayor of such a cute little Wisconsin town.

Third: The whole town is going to get FAT! I guarantee it! Check this out if you don’t believe me. The woman is diabolical. She’ll show up to all the Council Meetings with cake and cookies, enough for everyone to take home to their families. At every public event, she will take it upon herself to make sure that EVERYONE gets pie; not a piece of pie, A WHOLE PIE! They won't be able to resist. She's amazing; like a little Betty Crocker Oven in Target sneakers. It’ll be something to see.

I have half a mind to drive up there this weekend and take a bunch of "Before" pictures. Who’s with me? Come-on, it’ll be a fun road trip. I bet we can snag some good eats while we’re there!

MidNight Add-On: I was just thinking about what a kick-ass Mayor my Mom is going to be. The woman totally knows what's going on locally, nationally and internationally. She's well-read, socially connected and a good citizen. I'm thinking Hilary should take a serious look at Mom as a running mate in 2008!


At 6:24 PM, Blogger Rednaked said...

That is just too cool - Go Mayor Mom!

I hope she wins and makes baking the official town sport.

At 12:01 AM, Blogger New Girl said...

That is so cool.

You will get to tell people "Hey-my mom is the Mayor!"

She gets my vote just for raising such an awesome daughter-see what she did with one person? There can be a whole town of Hot Chiks!!

At 12:11 AM, Blogger theresa said...

My Dad said he's looking forward to telling people that he's sleeping with the Mayor!

At 12:48 AM, Blogger Larry Jones said...

So when you visit your Mom's town, you'll be the First Daughter?

At 1:28 AM, Blogger Alli said...

I freakin love your mom yo. Wanna come over and tell stories with me ala drunkass?

At 8:14 AM, Blogger Carm said...


Cool for your mom! She sounds kick-ass, which is I guess where you get some of it from??

I've been reading your bog, as you know, for months now. I find you absolutely fascinating! Here's my assessment of you from what I've read: You're a super-intelligent and really fun person who has overcome some of the worst garbage that life can throw at a woman in this world. You've overcome it and claimed your power and your joy - and you've done it your own way. Its an inspiration to read your blog.

I find that Lu, too, is claiming her power and her joy.

More power to you and to Lu and to your fabulous mom!


At 8:24 AM, Blogger Maurice_Basilius said...

Yea for Her soon to be Honor!

I am sure she will just get the town to pleasingly plump.

At 9:03 AM, Blogger theresa said...

Oh Maurice, you must mean plump, juicy and succulent like ME!

At 11:40 AM, Blogger Kay said...

When I lived in my last town of about 1100 people, the long-term mayor was a woman in her 60's or 70's. She was a great lady, always happy to meet everyone and talk about her kids or grandkids. She came to our weekly quilting group at the library/town hall whenever she wasn't at a town meeting or ladies' auxiliary meeting. She had to deal with a lot of crap from small-minded people and she remained sensitive without letting it get to her. All this for an annual salary of $150.00. Anyway, it made me think that grandmother-age women are probably best qualified for public office, especially for small towns, because of the crap they've had to overcome and people they've had to keep happy in their lives.

You go, Theresa's mom!

At 12:03 PM, Blogger cricket said...

that is *awesome* :)


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