Saturday, January 08, 2005

The One Hundred

For those of you who want to know a few fascinating tidbits about the Love Goddess, you will have to discover them mixed hither and thither within this list of only moderately fascinating bits:

  1. I can fold fitted sheets perfectly.
  2. I’ve never sung Kareoke.
  3. I didn’t shave my legs from 1996 to 2004.
  4. I taught myself how to knit online.
  5. My hair is naturally curly.
  6. It’s not naturally blond.
  7. Except in the summer, when it turns to gold.
  8. I can run in high heels.
  9. My favorite super hero is American Maid.
  10. My favorite comedian is Eddie Izzard.
  11. I’m a great kisser.
  12. I know CPR.
  13. The weight on my driver’s license is 10 pounds more than I actually weigh.
  14. My driver’s license photo is one of the best pictures I have of myself.
  15. I’ve been in love 3 times.
  16. I have more than one best friend.
  17. An X-Ray tech once told me I had the best bones he’d ever seen.
  18. I told him that was the best pick-up line I’d ever heard.
  19. I’ve had sex with 21 different partners.
  20. Only three of them were women.
  21. I’ve never had an STD.
  22. I’ve never been pregnant.
  23. Sometimes I regret not having children.
  24. I only use linen napkins at home.
  25. I’m plagued by fears that someone I love will die.
  26. I hope I die first.
  27. No one extremely close to me has ever died, except my dog when I was 9.
  28. I’ve only had one job interview where I wasn’t offered the job.
  29. I’m not jealous or possessive in relationships.
  30. I don’t believe nice guys finish last.
  31. I really like other women.
  32. I’m very flexible. In 3-inch heels, I can lay my palms flat the floor.
  33. One of my lovers told me I was too exuberant in bed.
  34. Jay Leno woke me up after I fell asleep while reading in a hotel lobby.
  35. I plant gardens because I love to play in the dirt.
  36. I broke and dislocated my ankle 12 years ago.
  37. The surgical plate attached to the bone set off metal detectors at prisons, but not airports.
  38. One summer I was hospitalized for a week with swimmer’s ear.
  39. I’ve been a bridesmaid 4 times.
  40. I proposed to my husband.
  41. On Stage.
  42. There was no audience, but the cast was backstage with champagne.
  43. I’ve been to two nudist camps.
  44. I skinny-dip every chance I get.
  45. I like to have painted toe-nails, but not painted fingernails.
  46. I love to vote.
  47. I give genuine compliments.
  48. Other people’s parents really like me.
  49. I haven’t eaten meat, other than fish and seafood, since 1986.
  50. I’ve been to Great Britain three times.
  51. I have more patience with others than I do with myself.
  52. I’m terrified of mice.
  53. My college roommate’s boyfriend was an officer in a street gang.
  54. I think people who are smart-asses are funny.
  55. But, I don’t like cruel humor.
  56. I’ve never owned a couch of my own.
  57. I was arrested once for illegal trespassing.
  58. I’ve had one blind date in my life.
  59. My blood type is AB negative.
  60. I’ve never bought a bad car.
  61. I used to weigh 80 pounds more than I do now.
  62. I’ve also weighed less than I do now.
  63. In a crisis, I usually seem calm.
  64. I played the cello for 11 years.
  65. My most difficult performance was for the funeral of a 5 year-old.
  66. I love my in-laws.
  67. I look great in hats.
  68. I can start a campfire.
  69. I’ve witnessed over 50 rape exams at the hospital.
  70. I have perfect gay-dar.
  71. When I drink, I drink good beer.
  72. I don’t believe in god.
  73. I do believe in an afterlife.
  74. I have a clear sense of morality.
  75. I can be very opinionated.
  76. I have one brother and two sisters.
  77. I have two nieces and six nephews.
  78. My parents have been married for 42 years.
  79. My mother tells me things about their sex life.
  80. I don’t know what my IQ is.
  81. I don’t want to know what my IQ is.
  82. I like to tell people that I’m older than I really am.
  83. I found my first gray hair when I was 34.
  84. I’m an amazing cook.
  85. I lost my virginity when I was 20.
  86. I didn’t have sex until I was 22.
  87. I wore braces on my teeth from age 12 to 18.
  88. It’s nearly impossible for me to sleep in a bed with clothes on.
  89. I hate having my ears licked.
  90. I have extremely sensitive nipples.
  91. I’ve never seen "Gone With the Wind".
  92. I know how to flirt well.
  93. In the last 6 months, 3 people have told me I look like Glenn Close.
  94. I make friends easily.
  95. My favorite dessert is chocolate cake with white frosting and vanilla ice cream.
  96. I make parallel parking look easy.
  97. I like my partner to watch while I’m giving him head.
  98. I hate every song from the musical, "Oklahoma".
  99. Some really bad things have happened to me.
  100. I’ve survived all of them.


At 10:43 AM, Blogger Ed said...

101. I started a campaign to make 2005 the Year of Cunnilingus.

You lost 80 pounds? Wow, that's quite an achievement.

Where did you go in the UK out of interest? And when you're over here next can you help me buy a car?

At 1:18 PM, Blogger kissonmytoes said...

i'm absolutely dying to do you fold fitted sheets?? i can't figure it out.

At 1:50 PM, Blogger theresa said...

Maybe I should do a "How-To" video on folding fitted sheets and make a million dollars.

At 2:14 PM, Blogger John Q. Public said...

There's a way to fold fitted sheets? I generally use the "wad them up in a big fucking ball" method myself.

Glenn Close, huh? Innnnnnteresting.

At 2:53 PM, Blogger theresa said...

Maybe I should do the video naked with a porn sound track.

At 5:04 PM, Blogger Goldfish Shoals said...

I would totally watch a how-to video if the preview showed naked people wading fitting sheets into big balls.

At 6:16 PM, Blogger theresa said...

Hey Shipwrecked, you could be in the video too! You could do one of those real-people-on-the-street testimonials about how the video changed your life.

At 9:45 AM, Blogger dwduck said...

Number 30...not true. :) And you have got to try Karaoke.

At 2:47 PM, Blogger theresa said...

Duck - When you're living happily-ever-after with your true love, I'm going to say, "I told you so". And, I'm way too shy for Kareoke (tee hee).

At 3:07 PM, Blogger Kay said...

Nice list. I too paint my toenails but not my fingernails, am deathly afraid of mice, and only drink good beer. No WONDER I like you! LOL!

At 9:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You've compelled me to write my own 100.

I don't believe nice guys finish last, either. But they do need to run a longer race.

At 10:20 AM, Blogger Dtrini said...

I'm a friend of Mossy Stone's and that is how I got the link to your 100. nice list. I'll be back to peruse the rest of the site later. Ciao.

At 9:47 AM, Blogger ZooooM said...

101. You rock. Totally and completely.

Love, Zoom

At 11:22 AM, Blogger Dick the Boomer said...

I too have one brother, two sisters, and sensitive nipples. Weird, huh?

You are one Foxy Lady, my dear!


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