Friday, December 31, 2004

The Things That Suck About ADHD

Back in November, I posted a few of the fun things about having ADHD. Surprise! There are also some things that make it a daily nightmare to live with. (You didn't really think I'd over-look this list forever did you?)

  1. I can’t remember more than three things at a time unless I write them down, and even then, I have to concentrate really hard (eggs, toilet paper, coffee… eggs, toilet paper, coffee… eggs, toilet paper, coffee… eggs, toilet paper, coffee…)
  2. No matter how soon I start to get ready to go somewhere, I’ll be late. How about I come to your house for a 4th of July Bar-B-Q. I’ll start getting ready now. Wanna bet I’ll show up 15 minutes late and out of breath?
  3. Every day I have to write a list of things to do.
  4. Every day I lose my list of things to do and have to write it again.
  5. Sometimes it’s embarrassing when I have to wear a balloon tied to my wrist at the mall so my friends can find me when I wander off.
  6. Sometimes it’s not so cute when I feel more comfortable hanging with the three-year olds at social gatherings rather than the grown-ups.
  7. I have to take drugs to help me focus. They keep me awake at night. So, I have to take more drugs to make me sleep. I sleep about 4-5 hours a day.
  8. Loud noises, constant noises, bright lights, and anything remotely uncomfortable will absorb my attention and completely irritate me. Sitting on an airplane with that constant loud goddamn engine hum nearly sends me scratching and clawing my way through one of those little windows. The only way to survive Trans-Atlantic flights is through the aid of alcohol, lots and lots of blessed alcohol
  9. Somewhere trapped inside my brain, there are more ideas and thoughts than I will ever have time to utter, let alone organize into any kind of productive action or communication. According to my father, I’d be a fucking genius if I could get all my brains in one place (Although, I don’t think he used the word "fucking").
  10. I’m clumsy because my brain is moving faster than my body. For instance, my brain will be putting my seatbelt on before I get into the car. Thus, I fall on my ass in the parking lot. This is how I became known affectionately as "Twinkle-Toes". This is also how half the guys from the manufacturing center got a nice crotch shot last summer.
  11. I’m completely fascinated by new and interesting things. This means the last new and interesting thing becomes abandoned in the bottom of a closet or the garage. To date, I have the largest collection of unused power-tools in the free world. These are remnants of my one-time desire to become a carpenter and wear cool safety goggles like Norm Abrams.
  12. I lose my keys, my cell phone, my glasses, and my shoes every single day. One time I lost my parent’s car in the parking ramp at O’Hare airport. Fortunately, they were in Europe for a month so I had time to find it.
  13. Throughout my public education, teachers thought I was stupid. I made it to college on a music scholarship. It wasn’t until I had several 4.0 semesters in a row that it occurred to me that I might not be completely daft. But, then perhaps I just got good at faking it. ADHD completely fucks with a girl’s self-esteem.


At 9:23 AM, Blogger Lu said...

Well, sweetie, like I always say--at least you're not boring! I think your ADD is actually one of the reasons you're my best friend: it works very well with my memory problems. You can tell me the same story over and over and it seems fresh and new each time!

Seriously, we've talked about the fact that both ADD and bipolar disorder suck the most when we're trying to be "normal". You and I are most decidedly NOT normal, so let's just quit trying, ok? I love us just the way we are!

That other weird hot chik,

P.S. You ARE fucking brilliant!

At 2:38 PM, Blogger Goldfish Shoals said...

Do you know how much fun you can have with eggs, toilet paper, and coffee?? A lot, I bet.

At 2:34 PM, Blogger Shea said...

You're a strange person...

At 2:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would totally rather have ADHD or ADD .. than just loosing my memory to old age, what the hell is that all about?

At 10:41 PM, Blogger Ron Southern said...

Well, I am losing my memory due to age, moderately so far, but many a neuron is misfiring already. Some cases are worse, I'm sure, though I doubt it matters much about the cause if it causes discomfort. You seem sensible to me via your writing, so I guess you're able to concentrate sufficiently. I can, too, though it used to be no effort involved.


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