Thursday, February 03, 2005

Flex for Me, Baby!

I’ve met a number of men through the years who’ve described themselves as "Hopeless Romantics". Several of them have made reasonable efforts, but few have demonstrated a mastery of this self-proclaimed title. Perhaps this is because I failed to inspire a whole-hearted romantic response, or perhaps they were full of hot air … or maybe we simply had different ideas about what Romance is all about. What I find most amusing is that the one man, who has most often brought a sappy tear to my eye with tender thoughtful gestures, consistently scoffs at romance and denies that he wants any part of it (you know who you are).

In the spirit of Average Joe’s "Cosmo" style Quiz, I have designed an alternate. It may be more fitting for what some women are looking for. I was inspired by a statement BlueEyes made in one of his posts, "Women need a reason to have sex, men only need a place." While I think this is a generalization, I also believe many women would like more romance while just as many men struggle to comply.

I have one last thought before beginning the Quiz. While watching Sex in the City, or some Chick-Flick, one of the characters said something that struck home. She said that when men make grand gestures in relationships, they are considered romantic and brave, but when women do the same, they are considered desperate. It’s something to think about.

It's time for our Male visitors to flex their Romantic Muscles.
Gentlemen, the submission of your answers is entirely voluntary. I will post the correct answers in a few days for those who are shy and would rather check their score privately.


Romance Quiz

A. Which of these phrases expresses the greatest romantic sentiment?

  1. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. (Albert Einstein)
  2. For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. (Judy Garland)
  3. There’s a lot to be said for self-delusionment when it comes to matters of the heart. (Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, 1993)
  4. You don’t love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her. (Anon)

B. Which of these is the MOST romantic date?

  1. A quiet dinner and a show
  2. Cocktails and a dance club
  3. A drive in the country and a picnic
  4. Watching an old movie at home while eating microwave popcorn and a bag of peanut M&Ms

C. You’re out for dinner and your date spills wine on her blouse. You …?

  1. Ask the serving staff for club soda and extra napkins to clean the stain.
  2. Offer to take her home to change.
  3. Tell her she looks beautiful when she’s blushing with embarrassment.
  4. Cut dinner short and hope this means you can get the blouse off faster.

D. Women continue to struggle for equal rights. After decades of such strife, the impact on dating etiquette has become a cliché. So, do you offer to pay for dinner?

  1. Yes
  2. No
  3. I’m not investing that much time and energy. I just pick women up in bars.

E. The day after you have sex with her for the 1st time, you acknowledge the experience by?

  1. Sending flowers with a handwritten note to her home or workplace.
  2. E-mailing to tell her how much you enjoyed the experience.
  3. Calling her to chat and ask her out again.
  4. What? I scored. Time to move on.

F. Rank the following gifts from most romantic to least romantic:

  1. A book by her favorite author
  2. Pretty lingerie
  3. Gift certificate for a massage and a facial
  4. A bracelet you noticed her admire a few months earlier.

G. To set the mood in the boudoir, you?

  1. Change the sheets and put the kids to bed early.
  2. Light candles and put on sexy mood music.
  3. While getting out of the shower, grab her ass and say, "Wanna?"
  4. Massage her feet while she’s taking a bath and talk to her about the day.

H. The following best describes your attitude about sex:

  1. You get what you give.
  2. We’re in sync, so I don’t really have to think about it.
  3. If she’s not satisfied it’s because she’s not trying hard enough.
  4. My satisfaction is all about getting her motor running.

I. When your Sweetie walks into the room, what’s the first thing that comes to mind?

  1. I wonder what kind of mood she’s in?
  2. Sweet Jeezus, that’s what I’m talkin’ bout!
  3. She’s going to ask me if I paid the water bill. Should I lie or tell the truth?
  4. First, kiss those gorgeous lips, then …

J. Which term of endearment seems the most romantic to you?

  1. Muffin-Butt
  2. Sassy Pants
  3. Sweetheart
  4. Sex Kitten
  5. Ball & Chain
  6. Cupcake
  7. Sweet Blossom Lips
  8. Buttercup
  9. Trick
  10. Spankalicious
  11. Suggest your own

14 Comments:

At 11:59 AM, Blogger greenman said...

I will answer but I don't want to give away all of my secrets first, so maybe in an email or on my blog.

 
At 12:10 PM, Blogger Kay said...

I will be paying VERY CLOSE ATTENTION to the responses to this quiz!

Of course, it's the men here who are the unavailable ones and who will be answering it. How frustrating.

 
At 12:38 PM, Blogger Bryna said...

I am kind of interested in seeing what your answers are for this. Some of them made me smile... those must be the correct answers, right? :)

 
At 1:39 PM, Blogger Opaco said...

am i the only one to answer on line. geez.

A - 2 [one of the more romantic quotes ever]

B - 3 [i feel this date would allow more time to talk, to get to know one another on a personal level]

C - 2 [don't acknowledge the spill as this may embarass her, only if she laughs about it should you bring it up. just simply offer to take her home and try and continue the evening without making her feel bad about it]

D - 1 [i know equal rights say split the check or whatever. but i have a hard time doing that. i always pay for friends and dates, it just makes sense. not that i am the man, but that i invited this person out, i pick up the bill.]

E - 1 [i don't know if i like this one, but i felt it was the closest. i would most likely try and go see her. not to thank her, that would be desperate, but to let her know how much it really meant to me.]

F - 4,3,1,2 [the bracelet itself isnt' the romantic part, it is that you noticed her admiring it and remembered.]

G - 4 [messaging her feet will give you time to relax her and bond with her. you need to talk and listen to her to get that connection that will make her want to share herself with you. plus, everyone needs a good foot rub.]

H - 4 [i always make sure and get her motor running. i mean there are times when she does it for me and i do it for her, but most of the time, love making is about us. we are not done till we both are happy.]

I - 4 [i am so physically attracted to her. i stop thinking when she comes in the room. when i first see her i really want to kiss her.]

J - 11: i call my fiance "babygirl". she tells me that it makes her feel all warm inside when i call her by it.

 
At 1:55 PM, Blogger John Q. Public said...

Yay!!!

A quiz from the Hot Chik! And a most excellent quiz it is!

My responses (why do I have the feeling I'm going to put the proverbial foot in the mouth?):

A. 4 - Beauty is completely subjective. If I do happen to fall in love one day, I imagine that this is a big part of what it's all about.

B. 4 - All necessities are covered. Quiet time alone with a lover, a good movie, popcorn and peanut M&Ms.

C. Hmmmm. Depends on the woman and her ability to be comfortable in her own skin. So, I'll go with 1 or 4.

D. 1. Every time. If she wants to step up and kick in, great. If not, great. I still hold doors open for women and stand when they arrive or leave the table. I think I watched too much "Father Knows Best" and "Leave it to Beaver" as a kid.

E. Again, depends. Married woman: 3. Single woman: 1 and 3, but it's a fine line. Don't want to appear as a psycho stalker.

F. 1, 4, 3, 2

G. 4. But, then again, I like women's feet.

H. 1. Shallow, yes, but that's how I see it. It's all very Yin and Yangish.

I. 2!!!

J. 11 - Beautiful.

 
At 4:50 PM, Blogger Dannyness said...

Here we go.
A-3
B-3
C-1
D-1. I OFFER to pay for dinner because it's just a nice thing to do. Not because I believe it is my responsibility as the man.
E-3
F-1432- 1 and 4 show that you've been paying attention and know what she'd like.
G-3. I do #4. But not to "set the mood in the boudoir."
H-1
I-2
J-1

 
At 4:53 PM, Blogger zenboy99 said...

OK, here goes:

A. 2 - no question

B. 3

C. 1 and 3

D. 1

E. 3

F. 4,3,2,1

G. 4 and 2

H. 4

I. 4

J. 3

 
At 5:49 AM, Blogger Muslim said...

hi popped in here...

 
At 10:55 AM, Blogger Ed said...

A. 4

B. Any of those could be (except 2 maybe) - depends what you make of it but if I had to go for one it would probably be 3.

C. 2 (and hope it turns into 4 - just kidding!)

D. 1

E. Not much experience of this one as I haven't had sex with anyone except my wife for 26 years (and not likely to in the future either, I hope) but in a purely hypothetical situation I guess probably 1

F. 4, 1, 3, 2

G. 2

H. 4

I. 4

J. 11 - a Welsh word 'Cariad' meaning love, or 'Fy Nghariad' (pronounced roughtly Vun Hariad) meaning my love. Welsh is a very romantic and poetic language - not that I speak it very well - Sue and I are learning it together.

 
At 11:05 AM, Blogger Goldfish Shoals said...

It was so hard for me to focus after "peanut M&M's." I really love peanut M&M's. One of my favorite breakfast foods.

 
At 11:05 AM, Blogger Charlie Gordon said...

A. 2
B. 3.. although being at home all cuddled up, sharing a bowl of popcorn and watching an old movie together can be great as well
C. 3
D. 1.. we have a standing arrangement. I pay for everything except breakfast. But, I have a job and she doesn't
E. 1
F. 1,4,3,2 for her birthday last year, I got her a first edition of Gone With The Wind, her favorite book of all time. Huge, mega-points for me.
G. 4.. massaging the feet does it for her every time, especially if there is a lot of kissing / toe sucking going on, also
H. 4
I. 2.. Only it's more like "Damn she's beautiful"
J. 11.. we call each other honey and babe interchangeably.

 
At 11:07 AM, Blogger Goldfish Shoals said...

Also, I suggest "Peanut M&M" as a nickname for the last question.

 
At 11:16 AM, Blogger theresa said...

Goldfish, If I call you my Hot & Sexy Peanut M&M, will you make-out with me?

 
At 12:08 AM, Blogger TryingTimes said...

A. Which of these phrases expresses the greatest romantic sentiment?
For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. (Judy Garland)


B. Which of these is the MOST romantic date?
None of these, but if I *have* to choose then it would be:
Watching an old movie at home while eating microwave popcorn and a bag of peanut M&Ms


C. You’re out for dinner and your date spills wine on her blouse. You …?
Offer to take her home to change - AND:
Tell her she looks beautiful when she’s blushing with embarrassment.


D. Women continue to struggle for equal rights. After decades of such strife, the impact on dating etiquette has become a cliché. So, do you offer to pay for dinner?
Yes


E. The day after you have sex with her for the 1st time, you acknowledge the experience by?
Sending flowers with a handwritten note to her home or workplace.


F. Rank the following gifts from most romantic to least romantic:
least: Gift certificate for a massage and a facial
next least: Pretty lingerie
close: A book by her favorite author
bingo: A bracelet you noticed her admire a few months earlier.


G. To set the mood in the boudoir, you?
Set the mood? Are you kidding? Do you know how often I get to have sex with my partner?

Oh well, as we're playig I'll pretend the situation was happier and:

Change the sheets and put the kids to bed early. Yep
Light candles and put on sexy mood music. Yep
Massage her feet while she’s taking a bath and talk to her about the day. Yep.


H. The following best describes your attitude about sex:
My satisfaction is all about getting her motor running.


I. When your Sweetie walks into the room, what’s the first thing that comes to mind?
First, kiss those gorgeous lips, then …


J. Which term of endearment seems the most romantic to you?
Cuddle-bunny.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home