Thursday, November 04, 2004

SLUT

When I was first in college my friends gave me a t-shirt that said, "I love everybody and you're next." Although I was inexperienced at the time, it was unbelieveably prophetic. A few years later, after dipping my toes in the pool of love, my boss nicknamed me the "Lusty Wench". Later still, a boyfriend affectionately called me a "Slut" because I enjoyed sex more than any woman he'd ever met. And now, many years later, after countless (yes, I've stopped counting) adventures, Lu has dubbed me the Love Goddess.

The word "Slut" still sticks in my mind, however. I hear it used over and over again to describe women in a demeaning way. I don't get it. What's wrong with a woman enjoying lots of sex? Did we learn nothing from the wise and blessed Madonna?

A woman's body is really good at sex. We can go longer than guys. Our tiny little clits have twice as many nerve endings as those big huge penises. And, best of all, we can have multiple orgasms. Being a slut should be a good thing. It's like driving a Cadillac until it has 250,000 miles on it. If you've got a good ride, why keep it in the garage?

I'd really like this whole double-standard thing to end. It's ridiculous that women still have to concern themselves with their reputations. How is it that we are still so oppressed that we can't enjoy sex openly? If we do happen to enjoy it, we have to keep our joy a secret. Both straight and gay men are allowed the open freedom of multiple partners as frequently as they wish. They can even brag about it. If a woman does so, she's a total Slut. Sure, occassionally a man is called a Slut, but it is often with a bit of puffing up and a few snickers of pride. No such luck with us gals. If a girl is called a Slut, it's no surprise to find her hiding in the restroom crying her eyes out.

I for one have fought long and hard for my sexuality. I survived a conservative religious upbringing that shamed women for having sexual desire. I took back my sexuality after a rapist stripped it from me. And, I fight every day to challenge an archaic social structure that continues to insist that "good girls don't." Screw It! I LOVE SEX!

I claim my right to enjoy the pleasures of my tender juicy succulent flesh. It's mine goddamit! If that means I'm a Slut, then I proudly call shotgun in the hotpink Caddy to Slutville.

9 Comments:

At 1:55 PM, Blogger Goldfish Shoals said...

Wait...slut is a demeaning term? Oh, Hell. This whole time...

 
At 3:08 PM, Blogger Jessica said...

I still reserve the right to call a girl a slut, but I am an equal opportunist. I am just as ready to call a man a slut as a woman.

And there is a difference, there is a girl/guy who sleeps with lots of people without regard to the potential feelings and ramifications of those who they proclaim to be friends and loved ones. For example, a girl/guy who sleeps with their best friend's boyfriend/girlfriend. That is a slut in the worst sense of the word and is not to be desired.

But a girl/guy who sleeps around because they enjoy sex, but still abide by "girl code" or "guy code", I think that is perfectly acceptable and high advisable!

 
At 6:09 PM, Blogger Goldfish Shoals said...

I hereby proclaim us all to be the good kind of sluts.

 
At 11:42 PM, Blogger theresa said...

I like the term, "Ethical Slut". If no one gets hurt it's a happy party. If someone does get hurt, it's important to make sure that we are all individually responsible for our own relationships. My long-term relationships have been open for years. If a guy tells me that he's in an open relationship too, I shouldn't have to play Magnum PI in order to play with him. If he turns out to be a big fat liar, shame on him. If I ignore obvious signs that he's a big fat liar, shame on me too.

 
At 3:00 PM, Blogger kasie said...

Whooo-hoooo! Sluts unite! Fuck standards, we set our own with no apologies.

 
At 4:59 PM, Blogger Lu said...

T, I like your term "Ethical Slut," too. Perhaps we should have included it in the Hot Chiks Code... After all, all Hot Chiks are Ethical Sluts by definition, aren't they?

 
At 8:47 PM, Blogger modgurl said...

YOU GO GIRL!!! *applause applause*

 
At 5:30 AM, Blogger Carm said...

Go Theresa!

Being a slut IS a good thing...take it from a gay man in an open relationship...and its time women own their sexuality and take it back from the oppressors.

Sex is fucking great - its one of the greatest things about being alive! Your sex or your sexuality make no difference.

 
At 8:43 AM, Blogger Tiger said...

...not only is it an archaic term but one steeped in the awfulness that is today's patriarchal society.

It didn't always used to be like this. Women USED to BE Goddesses--revered, worshipped, and yes... Sex was their power.

It still is.
They just like to keep us from remembering that... at some point they realized it and it scared the bejeezus outta them.

:)

I LOVE the last line... I love the whole Cadillac analogy. Beautiful. :)

 

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