What Should I Do When I Get Big?
So how long does the average midlife crisis last? I'm past the 2-year mark and there is no end in sight. It's difficult rationalizing that I'm an intelligent woman exploring all that life has to offer rather than a dumb-ass fumbling about without a clue.This isn't meant to be a pity-party rant. I don't necessarily feel bad about myself. I'm cool as hell. I have great friends and a decent sense of rhythm. Everyone that matters knows that I'm a totaly hot - and I have the clothes and shoes to match. I make people laugh, and I laugh a lot myself, but not in the annoying way. I love sex and I'm damn good at it. My resume rocks (however I've wisely excluded my sexual history). My mental health is stable, and I have both collectable snow globes from the Fargo movie as well as an American Maid action figure doll.
Two and a half years ago I had a job that was killing me and no life. I had a stable marriage to a man I rarely saw, and a stable affair with another man I also rarely saw. I had friends who said things like, "remember when we..." because I never had time to do anything but work. My family said things like, "Do your clients matter more to you than we do?" And, I rationalized that my clients NEEDED me more so it was okay that I missed more family events than I attended. When I hit the proverbial wall, I quit and have been resting, playing, exploring, and fumbling ever since.
So now I have 27 plus more years of work/career ahead of me, but I have no idea what to do with that time and energy. I'm bored as hell with my current blah-blah paycheck employment, but nearly everything else in life seems to be an exciting possibility. I have a new idea every week. One week I'm going to invent and make specialized Fortune Cookies and the next week I'm going to be a Sex Toy Tester.
So what does an experienced, bored, immature, conflict-avoiding 40-year old Hot Chik do with herself?
posted by Theresa @ 11/03/2004 10:54:00 AM
4 Comments:
I think you should climb a mountain.
Or write a novel.
Why not?
Climb a mountain? How about I get a couple of goats and race them to the top of the Benton Street Hill?
Hmmm, A Novel? Lemme me read yours.
...eek.
I've hit that wall. & I've been spending the past few months just kinda staring at it.
I'm in that "stable marriage (sorta:) to a man I barely see, affair? Well... not that I'm In one but I think about having one a lot... not with a MAN though.. ummm, my friends don't say "remember when we" because
well I don't seem to have any that haven't moved to opposite ends of the country..."
Yeah. I'm in that place.
Soooo
Let me know how you let yourself rest, play and explore.
I don't mind fumbling y'know???
& when you figure out what to do with yourself? Please let the rest of us in on that secret. :)
Turn fantasy into reality.
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